As I've started talking about going into missions full time, and wanting to go all over the world, one of my parents' biggest Biblical words of wisdom is "count the cost" (Luke 14:25-33). This morning I got to thinking about "counting the cost." At first, I was thinking about the reasons I gave my dad for purchasing a plane ticket to Denver this January before having all the funds for the school. The main reason I gave him being I firmly believe this is where God wants me going in January. It's a decision I've put a lot of thought and prayer into and I have faith that He will provide; buying this plane ticket is my act of faith, saying, "God, there is no way I can get the money in time for January without YOU; I have faith you can provide for this."
As my mind continued to race with "counting the cost," I realized how big of a bite it is to go into full time missions. Here I am, taking steps to go into a lifestyle of missions. I'm planning on moving to a different country, on a different continent. That's incredibly exciting! But what about once I've been there for a little while and the newness wears off? When I'm sitting on my bed, just wanting a hug from my mom? That, I realized, is part of the cost. When I wonder how I am supposed to pay for my necessities for the next week? That is part of the cost. Visas to be in a country not my own? Part of the cost. When I am frustrated, if God doesn't work in the ways I plan? Part of the cost.
Counting the cost doesn't just mean you have the money and are 100% set for your whole life. Counting the cost can mean being aware of what you're getting yourself into. Counting the cost is recognizing you don't necessarily have it all together, but you know God can make it come together.
In my counting the cost, I have realized I in no way have it all together financially. I'm going to have to rely on God fully and trust that He will make it come together. I have also realized I don't know what life is going to throw at me and some of the hardest times for me are yet to come. I will miss out on family gatherings. I will miss being home for holidays, family reunions, and birthdays.
But I know that what I am looking forward to and stepping into is held by my Creator. I also know that my God is worth all the cost in the world to rely on Him, rest in His security, and know that by His power, I get to go into all the world, outside of my comfort zone, and share the Love of my Savior with the world.
“We are often hindered from giving up our treasures to the Lord out of fear for their safety. This is especially true when those treasures are loved relatives and friends. But we need have no such fears. Our Lord came not to destroy but to save. Everything is safe which we commit to Him, and nothing is really safe which is not so committed.”
—A.W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God
